My hand turned me down
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
