Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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