do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
