I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
