I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
