I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
