Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize