mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i dont even know how to be here
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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