Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Randomize