oh god the rape fog is back!
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Randomize
