She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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