I just pynch a tree in the face
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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