Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You brought string cheese to the strip club
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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