Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
