Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
