dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize