Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize