She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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