I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
