You can't special order awesome
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize