Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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