At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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