So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
