Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
my being single is dangerous.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
