the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
