so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
