he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
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