I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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