He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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