I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
