I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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