I want to have your abortion
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
