Christians are straight up FREAKS
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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