I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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