I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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