That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
