everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
