And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
