I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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