Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize