Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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