Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize