You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
