Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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