I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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