I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
