i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
