Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry douche hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(415): View more from California

No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."

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(812): View more from Indiana

Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.

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(850): View more from Florida

some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover

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(817): View more from Texas

God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist

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(816): View more from Missouri

Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.

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(970): View more from Colorado

Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.

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(+61): View more from Australia

I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.

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(253): View more from Washington

I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.

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