she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
