rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
