she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
